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Now instead of going on one mediocre first date per month, you have access to 59 million online dating users across 1,500 dating apps and websites. Overwhelming is an understatement. Modern singles are submerged in options that don't correlate to more fulfilling dating experiences or outcomes. As a dating coach and the founder of Date Brazen, I help people create the strategy they need to become the boss of their dating lives. That means unpacking your dating roadblocks and self-limiting beliefs and using that information to find the best dates of your life. It also involves identifying any behaviors that could be hindering your chances of finding a match. Keep scrolling for my best dating app advice to help you navigate the world of online dating. The Dating App Dilemma. You've probably been in the cycle of downloading dating apps, getting overwhelmed—or spammed, harassed, insulted, or just generally pissed off—and deleting them. 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After working with hundreds of clients like Rebecca, I've identified six core mistakes many people make on dating apps. Here are those common pitfalls and what you can do to avoid them. Online Dating Advice. Mistake #1: Using too many dating apps. I know from swiping professionally as a former matchmaker that more dating apps don't mean "higher odds." More dating apps just mean more frustration and burnout. Dating is vulnerable and courageous. It requires a commitment to what I like to call "Heart Time," or the time you spend swiping, messaging potential dates, or even talking to your friends about dating. If you want a specific result (like a relationship), it's time to stop using your heart time casually or with a negative mindset. Tip #1: Focus on one or two dating apps. There's no magic bullet in dating apps, and I've worked with people who found their partners from all apps and sites. Importantly, just because one app worked for your friend or coworker doesn't mean it will work for you, so be selective about where you choose to invest your dating energy—and, yes, your heart time. To choose the right dating app for you, think about which you've had the most success on, which design you like the most, and the one on which you feel the best about yourself. Tinder: Great for a quick connection. If you're looking here, you might have to weed through even more options before landing a genuine connection. Bumble: Try if unsolicited messages make you nervous and you want more control over the messaging process (since women make the first move). Hinge, OkCupid, or Match: Consider if you want to go a little deeper than swiping, Hinge allows for more engagement with a profile, the user experience is pretty seamless, and many of my clients find success there. Match and OkCupid both have a wide base of users, which means more access, but it's a toss-up if you find people actively using the app who are your type on any given day. As I'll get into next, it's not exactly a numbers game. MeetMindful: Some of the smaller dating sites promise more thoughtful connection and match curation, which is what my clients who are ready to settle down desire. Ultimately, those burgeoning sites have a smaller pool of users to draw from, which means you might pay a premium for only a handful of options that may or may not be a good fit. Mistake #2: Treating dating like a numbers game. Conventional wisdom says the more dates you go on, the better your chances of finding a relationship. In my professional experience, that's not the case. Treating dating like a numbers game leads to the biggest problem with dating today: cognitive overload. As the late Helen E. Fisher, Ph.D., a biological anthropologist, said, "The brain is not well built to choose between hundreds or thousands of alternatives." Ever heard of decision fatigue? By the time you choose your breakfast, your outfit, and which work task to take on first, your brain may need a break from decisions—and presenting it with 10,000 eligible bachelors is not going to end well. So basically, when you buy into the "dating is a numbers game" myth, you guarantee cognitive overload, meaning dissatisfaction and burnout. Tip #2: Put your phone down when you feel overloaded. The numbers game anxiety can be counteracted by this counterintuitive truth: You're for the few, not for the many. Swiping with that mindset has the potential to completely change your dating game. For some of my clients, this idea can produce anxiety. However, if you want to attract a great date and relationship, adopting this "I'm for the few" mentality will help you identify higher quality matches for yourself and say "thank you, next" to the rest. It will also reduce any swiping-induced stress. Mistake #3: Swiping all the time. It's no surprise that we have become addicted to swiping all the time: Dating apps were invented to feel like a game, and our brains reward us with a hit of dopamine every time we get a match. A study found that "higher dating app use time predicted higher levels of craving." A huge issue for all of my clients is dating apps creeping into every moment of their day. I see constant swiping on the elevator during work, dinner, bed, or even during a date. These dating app dopamine hits are like fast food—gratifying in the moment and fleeting. They'll also leave you craving more. So, if your desired outcome is a great date or even a relationship, it's time to quit playing games with dating apps and start swiping with intention. Tip #3: Limit your time on dating apps and messaging. Use a dating app for only 10 to 20 minutes a day when you feel good about yourself and are cozy and awake (think: 20 minutes after work, curled up on your couch, or with your coffee in the morning after a quick meditation). This is because when you feel alert, safe, and strong, you will make more empowered dating decisions than if you were swiping mindlessly and too tired or distracted to stay focused on your goals. I also recommend that clients turn off dating app notifications because instant conversations with potential dates (who are basically strangers) aren't worth the stress it takes to be constantly dating app vigilant. Swiping and messaging in a set period per day will lead to lower stress, higher quality matches, and a greater sense of agency over your dating life. 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Local Dating: Finding Local Singles in Rural Areas of the United States. Your friend group hasn’t grown much since college — you’ve been there, met him. Your community hasn’t changed much, and while
Local Dating: Finding Local Singles in Rural Areas of the United States.

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Your friend group hasn’t grown much since college — you’ve been there, met him. Your community hasn’t changed much, and while you’d like to date locally, you’d also prefer to meet new people with similar interests as you. Local dating is HARD! Especially if you’ve lived in the same area nearly all your life. You know the owners of every plot of land within a 50-mile radius! At Farmers Only, our priority is to change how local singles view dating — we want to make it as fun and exciting as it should be. Our platform takes the pressure off while giving rural singles the choices they feel have been lacking in their area. Feeling hopeful about meeting local singles? We’re so glad we can help. Why Is Local Dating So Hard? Virtual matchmaking is a fairly new phenomenon. But in rural societies — especially those with farming backgrounds — matchmaking was a way of the world (at least the relationship world). Even in other countries, such as Ireland, this tradition still thrives. Matchmaking skills are passed on from father to their children, and local singles events are planned in village pubs so bachelors and spinsters can meet. Why is this so popular? Farmers in rural Ireland (where the majority of the population lived until half a century ago) were struggling to meet other local singles. Although Ireland is quickly becoming urbanized, matchmaking is far from a dying art. However, in the US, vast stretches of land make distance an ongoing challenge, especially when dating locally, and feeling like your options are limited. In Ireland, it’s unlikely that there will be fifty miles to the next town or village, whereas in North America, towns could be hundreds of miles apart. For this reason, virtual dating, even for locals, has exploded. What Is FarmersOnly Doing for Rural Singles? FarmersOnly wants to help local singles in rural America connect through our online dating platform. You can browse singles in your area, flirt, start conversations online, and get to know your potential matches before committing to meet in person. No more wasted nights scanning the room for someone new at your local line dancing gig or getting set up on blind dates with someone who knew someone back in high school. With Farmers Only, you can find local singles, or if it’s just not cutting it, date outside of your immediate area without leaving your home. FarmersOnly allows local singles to broaden their search to neighboring towns that may have otherwise seemed too far to take a chance on. Gone are the days of feeling as if you’ll never find love locally, or that fate just isn’t on your side when you have FarmersOnly. See Our Local Dating Success Stories. Our local dating success stories speak for themselves. Meet Rachael and Robin, who met after realizing that asking for a little help dating isn’t necessarily a bad thing — and they were both from East Texas! Or Jeffrey and Brittany, who found love in Southern Texas and realized quickly that a career move would not separate them. We have connected hundreds of couples in the local dating scene. No matter if you’ve considered throwing in the towel on love, or are newly single, FarmersOnly members love the experience they get when joining our platform. A Step-by-Step Guide to Local Dating. If you’re ready to start your local dating journey with FarmersOnly, follow our step-by-step guide to getting started: Set up your free account with FarmersOnly: After registering with FarmersOnly, you’ll browse our database of local singles before selecting the right dating package for you. Create your unique profile: Let yourself open up and have a little fun with this part. This is your opportunity to showcase everything about yourself. Your profile is your first impression, so be honest and share what makes you uniquely you. Don’t forget to choose a profile picture that makes you feel good. It’s time to start browsing local singles: Once your profile is set up, you’re ready to browse singles in your area. Log in to FarmersOnly to begin! Send a flirt or start a conversation: With FarmersOnly, you don’t have to start talking immediately — you can avoid awkward small talk. Send a flirt to see if you receive one back. Or, you can dive right in and start a conversation. Nothing is holding you back! Get to know your potential love match: If you’ve found someone who catches your attention and you feel you may be able to relate on different levels, it’s the perfect time to take things a step further. Our members can spend weeks, even months, getting to know each other online before speaking or meeting in person. Others decide they want to meet right away. You have complete control over your dating life with FarmersOnly. Have your first conversation: Conversing online is amazing, but eventually, you’ll want to hear the voice behind the profile photo. Take it to the next level and schedule a phone or video chat and get that much more familiar with each other. Sparks may fly even more once you see each other. Go on a date: You’ve chatted online. You’ve spent weeks calling each other nightly. You can’t start your day without saying “hello”. Now, you’re ready. You can’t wait to finally meet in person. First dates don’t have to be stressful. We recommend doing something that excites you both, like going for ice cream on the waterfront or a night of pool at a local bar. For rural singles looking for someone in their local area, online dating has never been more fun. Register for your free membership and start browsing local singles today. Local Dating FAQs. What Is the Best Local Dating Website? If you’re searching for a local dating site that puts YOUR needs above their own, we certainly think you’ll find that FarmersOnly is the best — but that’s not the only reason why. Ask our clients and you’ll find that our singles find our platform easy to use and easy to find a match. From setting up your profile to sending flirts and connecting in our chat rooms, FarmersOnly makes it easy to date locals online. We have thousands of singles registered and waiting to meet their match. With a large database of local singles, it’s easy to meet and get to know people in your area. How Is Local Dating Easier Online? This isn’t Ireland and we don’t have the history or tradition of hiring “matchmakers” in the US. Although your mother’s best friend might just think she’s a matchmaker in your small town. Rural living can feel way too confined and closed in, but with online dating, communicating with other singles in your area has never been easier.













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